Dear Father Christmas

Now, I know I should start by asking for world peace, but I’m not going to. Mainly because peace would be boring. We all need a bit of drama (by drama I mean “Oh shit the washing machine has packed up” and not “Oh shit my house is being attacked.” If you can stop the second one, then yes, please do that!)

I’m rambling.

Anyway, Santa, please please can you fix O’s wheeze?  That would be an awesome present for us.  Get the elves to invent an Unwheezer and come over and deal with it.  They must be able to do that right?  It would definitely make things better.

Can you also bring lots of boxes? Boxes hold stuff. We have a lot of stuff but not enough boxes. Boxes would be good.

And last but not least, please can you ask the housework fairy to come and clean. Just once.  I should be able to keep on top of it after the first big clean, I just don’t have enough time to do the big clean myself.

Lots of love

Ranty Beast Desk Monkey

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