At the hospital part 3

I manage to sleep until 8.30 when O woke up for a feed.

That’s when Jo comes in.

Jo the nurse.

The room was light by then.  She introduces herself. 

“Which ward am I on?” I ask.

“Didn’t they tell you?” She’s shocked.  I shake my head. They didn’t show me where anything is either.

Jo apologises.  I feel a bit better.  She shows me the loos, showers, kitchen and playroom.  I spy one of the mums from the assessment unit in the room next door to mine and wave.

Jo takes O and gives him cuddles.  She finds us a bouncy chair.  I cry.

She makes it feel ok.

She gets some bread and butter and jam and looks after O while I make toast and tea.  Then I force soms toast down and feed O his morning goop…

Then they move me to the room next door with the mum from the previous night.

Everything just feels better.

The consultant comes round.  I’m shitting it a bit as I don’t think my nerves can take another battering.  O is still using his arm.  He’s waving it around and picking up toys with it.

The consultant brings Bex, the Dr who diagnosed Os bronchiolitis.  She recognises us and that makes it better.

The consultant plays with O and O shows off, passing the toy from one hand to the other and preferentially using his left arm.

“I think the fracture is a red herring.” The consultant says. “The most likely cause being birth.”

I explain that his labour was quick and he dropped onto my leg and the consultant nods.

“I will get the consultant radiographers to check it and if the fracture is newer than 48 hours, we’ll have to run some more tests I’m afraid.” He says.  I nod, but I’m definitely not feeling accused.  This guy sounds like he’s on my side.  He wants to find out how it happened, not accuse me.  He leaves and I’m happier.

OH and L turn up and we munch and I take L down to the playroom while OH cuddles O to sleep.

OH then takes L to stay with mum for the afternoon and the Drs update me (no update). OH runs around getting shopping and sandwiches and mugs and pjs for the coming night and Bex comes in to tell me that the consultant radiographer isn’t happy with the image so we need another xray.

Five minutes later we are escorted to paediatric xray, I put on the lead jacket and pin O to the bed.  He’s better this time and holds still enough to get a good image.

We are escorted back up, we get menus for the following night and OH cuddles O to sleep while I have an hours nap.

The day has finally sped up again and things are moving and it’s all much more positive and I no longer feel quite so victimised although I don’t doubt that there are still questions.

OH is packing up to go and pick up L when Jo comes in.

“I’ve got an update.” She says looking nervous.

I feel my lunch threatening an exit.

“The Dr just called.  He’s spoken to the radiographer and he’s happy for me to tell you that there is no fracture and you can go home.” She blurts.

“What?”

“There’s no fracture.  You can go.” She repeats.

All that.  For nothing.

I speak to the registrar and get discharge papers then go to the security desk to get my discounted parking.  They tear up my ticket and tell me to buzz them at the barrier.

We are free.

I have been to emotional hell and back.  They apologised but is that enough? My faith in the system is completely destroyed as they criminalise the vulnerable.

On Monday I’m asking for Prozac.
As for O, he has a severe cold now and can barely breathe but he is otherwise fine.

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15 responses to “At the hospital part 3

  1. OMG! What an ordeal! What happened to innocent until proven guilty?!
    …and the worse bit- has anyone even wondered what really happened to the arm to go limp for a time? That aspect would still worry me.
    But atleast your out of that hellhole!

  2. Omg I can’t believe what they put you through and some of the instant assumptions made. It sounds a bit like they weren’t too sure and latched onto the shoulder idea when you mentioned it. I dont blame you for feeling like you did, I would have felt exactly the same. Hope you are ok and you’re feeling better after the big ordeal. It sounds like some of the doctors really need to look at the way they are treating parents.

    • Yes. I am hypersensitive at the moment but the whole process made me feel like no matter what I said, because I couldn’t tell them how he had fractured his collarbone it was obvious I had done it.

  3. I’ve just written and deleted a big rant about this bloody awful experience. I will just say this, the hospital need to learn how to speak to people and individual members of staff need to stop playing detective and start being what they are (doctors!). I could rant all day, it’s clear they caused unessesary and devestating upset to your family. The things that doctor said to you were not only hurtful but not in the intreset of anyone but her ego. Hope you guys are having lots of cuddles now your back home. Big hugs xx

  4. What’s sad is how your just suddenly dismissed by someone as if they are shooing you away … Like run along now… Shoo of you go… I’d be really annoyed too. .

    • Oh the nurse was lovely, but yes. All that build up and then “oh…we made a mistake.” Jo apologised as did the registrar and they obv talked to security about waiving the parking fee but I think the process still needs to be looked at to stpp ot criminalising parents just to stop the odd one or two who deserve to be incarcerated!

      • My friend lost her baby last summer, he was 48 hours old and just died in his sleep at home.
        when she returned from the hospital distraught and hysterical the police were right behind them… insisting her and her husband go down to the police station straight away to answer questions… he refused to let his wife go but said i will come.,.

        next day the police came round and questioned her for over 5 hours and removed all the baby’s stuff for inspection etc… what was heartbreaking was when they removed his moses basket… and put it in the back of their car. They said it was to check if the there was anything toxic in the baby’s things that could have caused his death. it was eventually ruled that it was a cot death.

        i know they are people out their who do abuse their kids and these inquiries are to fish them out… but the process is humiliating and heartbreaking.

      • Absolutely disgusting behaviour. As if it isn’t distressing enough losing a child. The processes definitely need to be looked at to halt this mindset of “check for abuse first.” It is emotionally destructive to put people through that kind of investigation. I know that what happened to us was only mild compared to what some people go through in an attempt to weed out those sick bastards who do actually hurt kids but the processes are gruelling and harsh and make mothers, fathers and carers feel worthless, useless and disappointed by the system. I cannot imagine how your friend felt. My heart goes out to her and her family and I’m so sorry she had to go through all of that.

  5. Have just read through this and it turned my stomach. Sounds absolutely awful. I can understand why you’re so upset. Officious idiots! Hope you can all get over it in a few days and have a lovely Christmas xx

  6. I can’t believe you had to go through all that for nothing. I can understand the questioning (although there was no need to treat you do poorly), but for it to be nothing just makes it harder. Then again, O has no injuries and that is the best outcome. Such a nightmare situation!

  7. Oh my word. I don’t think saying sorry is enough, they might catch child abusers and that’s great but they should treat people with respect until they know for sure. You poor thing, what a total nightmare, I literally don’t know what to say x

    • We were just saying – make the child protection form standard on arrival. No suspicion but on file if alarm bells ring. In our case, the xray should have been rejected before we were admitted. I was guilty until proven innocent. No idea what would have happened had the consultant not rejected the xray or he had actually had a fracture because, looking at the evidence, I thought I looked guilty. I was even planning out who would look after the kids when they incarcerated me and whether I would go to a priory or prison. I couldn’t think of a way which clear me.
      It’s over now though. We are composing a letter regarding our treatment and the rechecking of the xray.

  8. When i first read the blog / tweets i was gonna come on here all ‘well they do have to ask the questions’ blah f’in blah but what an absolute bag of shite!

    You and your whole family have been let down. What a disgrace to be treated in such a way when they were the ones in the wrong and you were just being the concerned parent if you didn’t give a shit about your child you wouldn’t have been there

    I look forward to hearing their response, how they will ever justify it is beyond me.

    Nic xx

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