I like to talk to myself. When I have five minutes that is. This time normally becomes available while I’m in the shower.
I love showers. It’s time away from the children where I can think. And nowadays, when I think, it is usually followed up by “that would be a really good thing to blog about.” This in turn is followed by an amazing title and starting few paragraphs. But who has the ability to be able to write these fantastic ideas down when they are in the shower?
Part of our evening routine after The Toddler goes to bed is to make sure the washing up is done and the living room is tidy. I always volunteer myself for washing up. Tidying is so much more energetic and energy isn’t something that I have huge reserves of right now. Again, though, this chance to do a mundane task results in my brain going a mile a minute thinking up some really amazing blog posts. I can’t stop mid dish to jot them down as this would halt the flow of awesome.
So, I am reduced to waiting until 3am when O is feeding or finding 10 minutes to get to the computer which is a very rare occurance and doesn’t really inspire me at all.
Then, like this post, I start something and don’t get a chance to finish it and it ends up all pointless and jumbled. I wish I could find the right ZONE. I just can’t. I think I might be trying too hard and feeling the pressure. I read a lot of blogs and some of them are amazing, written by some extremely talented people who should probably be making huge amounts of money from their skills, and I get jealous. I start comparing myself to them and then wishing I were them and then having a complete and total confidence failure. My blog isn’t that bad, it’s just that my brain sometimes runs away with me and I end up just typing crap before I’ve really had a chance to think about what I’m saying.
My advice would be to anyone still reading this is 1) don’t start a post and then finish it days later and expect it to be fully coherent. This goes doubly when you’ve just had a baby and yoiur emotions are so all over the place that you don’t know whether you are coming or going and spend a lot of time pinned to the sofa with a baby either sucking at your boobs or gulping back a bottle.
2) Do have an end goal in mind when you start a blog post. I normally think of an amazing start and then go completely off the track. This doesn’t hold readers’ attention and just serves to frustrate them and make them think that you’re full of shit.
3) Get some talent and actually bloody finish something. Hmm, this one is super tough, as I have very limited talent and very limited creativity right now. Even the knitting has tailed off. The last time I did something was the night I went into labour and I was desperately trying to finish The Toddlers’ PearPear. Sadly, it’s still on the table with no face, no stuffing and an open head. I’m not very good at completing things. This is again demonstrated by my lack of birth stories. I have started writing my first birth story at least three times and each time come across as a bit of a dick – don’t say anything to this. I know I can be a bit of a dick. And I LOVE talking about my labours and birth. I mean I ADORE IT! I’ve become a birth junkie – especially after my last labour. I love hearing about labours and births too.
And we should go back to the original topic, which I am demonstrating immensely well. My posts are jumbled mainly because MY HEAD IS PRETTY JUMBLED and I post as I think. I also talk as I think and that can be pretty jumbled too if you’re not keeping up. My brain works fast. My hands and mouth not so much.